Rant: Posse Foundation

The clock quietly ticks as each second rapidly becomes a figment of my past. Stop! Just for one moment can the clock fucking stop? 72 hours to plan the next four years of my life. Three years from now, my goals still stood at a similar level; however, my mind screams for mercy with the mere thoughts of Monday. Insanity and time - fuck you both.

We, as human beings, always wonder: "if an opportunity knocks on the door should we take it?" When passion and heart coincide, the answer seems evident. In contrast, once these two vital aspects of life deviate, the world becomes an opportunity fueled by the nuisance of making "the right" decision. We, as human beings, never know what we want. What happens if I swallow the wrong opportunity and choke? What if I prevent myself from tasting the most decadent opportunity and sulk in regret? As you can tell, i'm utterly ambivalent, scared, confused, and the like...

Regardless, something about this absolutely

[New Orleans, LA]

bewildering decision captivates me. I might not know what I want, but I do know what brings me ultimate happiness. Chin up, hopes high, passions strong, and an open mind - I am ready to learn from this decision. Bring it on, New Orleans, I'm ready to experience a whole new realm of culture and history.

xxx

For everyone who still seems confused about this post, I'm slightly ranting about a scholarship I am working towards: Posse. Within this program, individuals who see "leadership potential" in students have the opportunity to nominate a select few students for an extensive interview process. The scholarship is a "full ride" to top universities: UCLA, UC Berkeley, Tulane, Bucknell, University of Wisconsin - Madison, Dickinson, Grinnell, etc. (A total of 9)

Extensive:

Interview One: Of the 2,000+ students nominated for the scholarship, multiple groups across Los Angeles are created fostering about 100-200 students. In this group interview, a variety of activities test each student's "leadership potential." After a 3-4 hour "interview," the students return home and wait 2-3 weeks for a response.

Interview Two: After cutting more than half of the original 2,000+, a personal interview must be scheduled where 2 posse administrators asses your "leadership potential" on a personal level. Here, you must choose your "top 3 schools."

Interview Three: Each school then has a batch of 20-25 students to asses for a final group interview. During this interview, the admissions officers from the school (as well as the Posse administrators) look to see which students "stand out" and "work the best" in hopes of forming the most diverse network of students to attend the said institution.

Each school then finishes this process with a group of ten students.

Why am I bickering? Over the past four years my heart has constantly thought of only Cal (Berkeley, for the individuals who don't know). However, yesterday a letter in the mail came opening with "Congratulations! This letter is your official notification that you have been chosen as a finalist for the Posse Scholarship to Tulane University"...

Yet, I am so remarkably flattered that they see me at Tulane (as well as heartbroken). Tulane, in New Orleans, relies on Posse to help rebuild the city after Hurricane Katrina. Making a difference throughout a state - setting an example for the nation. How can that not bring shivers down my spine and mold a smile on my face? It might not be Cal, but attending a school in New Orleans means the heart of culture becomes my backyard.

See the ambivalence?

3 days... 3 days... 3 days...

Over and out,
Monica

Book: The Most Beautiful Book In The World

"What he meant to imply was that the greatest playboys - like himself - are actually mystics in search of mystery, and they will always prefer that part of the female creature that is not given to the one that is readily abandoned." - Eric-Emanuel Schmitt

Rant: "I was hit by a car!"

Coffee, a book, decent weather, and an afternoon devoted to reading or writing - what an ideal. One page after another, I sank deeper and deeper into my written concoction only to finish it in an hour or so. Determining what else to do (considering my coffee cup was still half full), I began writing a different version to my personal statement. What better of a topic than cycling? (Ha!)

Eventually my creative streak plundered and I resorted to heading back home, enjoying the wind in my hair and my flannel shirt mimicking superman's cape. In less than ten minutes, I was on the floor, hit by a car. Lovely, I know.

"Are you okay?" the tiny lady squealed from her oversized Explorer.
"I'm fine"
"Are you sure you're okay?"
"I'm fine, miss!"
Then I laughed at the whole ordeal. I was hit by a car! When the hell does that happen?

Of course, what better than a random guy picking up my bicycle, putting it in his trunk, and telling me to get in (granted, he didn't look like a creeper)? Lou only experienced a few broken spokes, squished pedals, and a busted cap. Myself? Well, I look like an abuse victim - go figure!

It's funny how the world works. One instant you're experiencing a rush of energy and happiness, and in less than a minute, the culprit of your happiness becomes the reason for your demise. As each experience, good or bad, becomes a mere memory, these instances shape our future decisions (for better or for worse - you take your pick).

Regardless, this situation did express a form of beauty - understanding. Even though this woman totally ran me over, I continued to laugh and smile. "You didn't take down her information!?!" No, I did not.

Why?

I'm alive. My bicycle has minor problems. Her car is fine. Why stress myself and this individual out when we both have the possibility of going on with our busy day? In a world of spite and greed, sometimes all we need is to breathe out. Why invoke more stress when our work-driven lives already take a toll on our precious sanity?

Fuck it, I want to enjoy life. Next time you get hit by a car (if you aren't hurt, of course) - breathe out, smile, and laugh. Sometimes the best remedy for an accident is just easing the situation. We aren't here for lawsuits, we're here to learn, inspire, succeed, and imagine.

Until next time,
Mon

An Attempt at Something New

As October soon comes to a close, my mind will step out the door come November - filled with deadlines, events, and my past being sealed (via the trustworthy internet) to "x" amount of institutions in order for them to determine my future. Joy...

Fortunately, my world has become enriched by the beauties of cycling and books where both activities somehow balance my insanity. This is my new outlet. Individuals, please enjoy this seemingly uninteresting individual.

This is my attempt!

Over and out,
Monica